STACKENBLOG

Hello Friends & Folks,

we are proud to present you the STACKENBLOG MEGARIDE PART ZWEI - coming around the corner with a fresh new Motto: "German Trinksport on Public Transport". What a Joy! As always we will start at the Supermarket down at the Kröpcke station. Bring some Herries with you, but we will make stops all the time so you can refresh yourself on some fresh Herrie Bottles and smoke a cigarette also.


It's like always: same place, same wave! Be there at 16:00 or be a square!!!1!

stackenblog.com
blogging teh german way!!!1one
presents:

28-12-2006 STACKENBLOGRIDE #ONE
1800 Savings Market / Kröpcke

Stackenblog.com presents its first Üstra Ride. After the unbelievably successful kiezkollegenrides in 2005, the Stackenblogger with "course driving the German way" starting through. Nice people, nice bierchen, nice route. Many objects of interest will stand on the program for travel across of Hanover interior and suburb. Meetings as used at the savings market Kröpcke (today Edeka) two zones tickets / Tagescarte should be put in. The daily map is quite recommended thereby.

In Brazil they have Favelas, in the USA they have Slums, in Argentina there are the Callampas or Villa Miseras, in Turkey are the Gecekondus, in Ecuador the Invasiones and in Peru the Barriadas. In Mexico they are called Rancherias, in Pakistan they call them Katchi Abadi, in India Bazars and in Kongo Bidonville. In Germany we call them Kleingartenverein.

The difference between other countries and germany is how we treat our Kleingärtner (inhabitants of Kleingartenkolonien, watch out for the Umlauts). While in South America and Asia some Governments tried to get rid of the problem by the measurements of bulldozing, we in Germany got used to our nowadays beloved inhabitants of the Kleingärten (also called Gartenzwerge).

Many Gartenzwerge are living of Hartz IV (i will explain this another time, but please don't mess it up with Harz, the beautiful Abhorchposten in the middle of Germany), but instead of getting settled down on unemployment they try to change their Slums into a Kolonie that looks even better than the famous Kolonie of Guantanamo Bay.

In the 80's the Bauernlümmel hat some infamous results with similar concepts called "Unser Dorf soll schöner werden", already back then we heard rumors that the American military is willing to trade german Unkrautvernichter against Agent Orange.

This is not what You all thinking about. This is kraftkarren for real. Has nothing to do with fried kraken and all that. This is the quad styled vehicle German Bundeswehr built in the 1970s.

Background

Since 1945 after WWII the austrian konigreich was willing to infiltrate the bundesrepublik with fast-food restaurants they called wienerwald.

The 'Made in Germany' reply to this

...was Kraftkarren! Build for german paratroopers defending the bundesrepublik from austrian schnitzelguys. Through this threat caused by the austrian schnitzelguys Zweirad-Union AG in Nurnberg invented the Kraftkarren (schort name: KRAKA)

German defence from austrian schnitzelguys

from the 1970s to 90s german paratroopers were thrown off Junker's aircraft where ever a wienerwald restaurant was opening. The soldiers were entering and ordered some pommes with schnizzle.

Germany wins

Equipped with kraftkarren the german bundeswehr could defend successful the bundesrepublik of deutschland.

Todays KRAKA

I had to write this on stackenblog because that all you new to germany people understand why there are so many guys on trikes and quads going to the macdonalds drive-in restaurants today. This is a traditional part to us german, since we had to defend the republik from austrian schnizzleguys, which is kept until today.

next time stackenblogging

Next update i will subscribe how german bundeswehr's answer to burgerbuden is. But this will not be today because for now I have to frittieren a sack of Nordsee-Kraken.

Hey guys, that nice stay we had in Cottbus germany in 2004 i not will withhold you. It was an icy and frosty winter on Garmisch as my brother Christoph and his friend Schmidt who is also a friend of mine came to have a visit in Cottbus/Germany. I was the lucky man the guys took with. Here is this what i would call a travelreport:

1. Loading the Kraftkutschen

On that cold morning in Garmisch/Bavaria we loaded tons of Beer and warm clothes as also some Deutschmarks into our Kraftkutschen. Kraftkutschen in Germany is what in other countries is called automobile. Next time i go to Cottbus/Germany i will choose a Toyota to manage theese lousy prussian structures and take much more beer with me. After crossing the Grenzposten to Prussia (Rudolphstein) the roads where really really bad.

2. Arriving at Cottbus

After that uncomfortable ride caused by that bad roads in Prussia Schmidt had to rub some franzbrandwein on my wounded back. As usual for all days in the GDR (the shortname for the Country) also on this day the sun was not shining

3. The stay

Cottbus is a very nice town in the middle of the Lausitz just north of Spreewald, where the Spreewaldgurken come from. Spreewaldgurken are very nice for Mettbrötchen or Leberwurst-Schnitten. But Schnitten in Lausitz is another almost important matter to gurken from Spreewald...

The amazing Lausitz-Chicks

The girls from Cottbus they call Lausitz-Chicks is what Western-Germs call Ossi-Schlampe. By the way. In Bavaria we more have blond girls with big 'hoo' (you know what I mean). The common Cottbus-Lausitz-Chick has not so much and more darker hair. The eyes are just like in Bavaria blue. Lausitz-Chicks are very, very nice. Because of the many beer I had to drink for not running back to germany i forgot to take some photos of those really nice Lausitz-Chicks. Next time I go to Cottbus I will take some photos for you.

Live in the streets

There was not so many more rather than these photos will show:
But there are also nice impressions in my memory lane ... but sorry, I forgot.

To be continued ...

On next update (Cottbus pt.II) i will try to give you some more impressions on Lausitz-Chicks. Also write something about that funny guy whose name i forgot. That little girl Schmidt called 'Freundin' (the german word for slut) will not be missing on next update. The discostay we had in Cottbus will also be written for next chapter.
so far, best regards from Garmisch

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For people that don't like the GDR for vacation: http://garmisch.de/de/dbdfbf19-d2d0-4d53-027a-1694e5071f61.html

For all of you who wants to visit us in germany as a tourist, this Tutorial will be essential for you to have a nice time. It shows you to eat a bavarian Weisswurst the right way. If you are able to do it right, it will be more easy to you to find your way in our wonderful bavarian Heimat. Don't wonder about the grubby look, but thats reality in Germany. We call it: "rustikal" or "urig".

Check out the latest Tatsachenbericht: It's incredible!
Take a look at the life of a german Fleischfachverkäuferin. Great! Her job is dangerous and wild, but she really likes it. Because Germans love Meat. And Hack. And Rippchen, Öhrchen and Nierchen sometimes... WOW!!! Stackenblog gets better and better!

we all know that germany got some fresh talent in the wildecker herzbuben and truckstop, but now a new generation of mcs is on the step up. these mcs are young and hungry for fame. they are really desperate to get attention from the audience, so they do about everything which attracts it, but see for yourself..

hey guys, check this stuff ich digged on german youtube channel. the german translation of one colt for all cases episode we have on german tv. the voices in german syncro are also known from star trek episodes we in germany call 'sinnlos im weltraum'. i really enjoy german translations on tv. in other cases we have to watch the austrian or australian versions. i like it when its on german! check how howie does it!!1

admiral specht is really happy today to announce a scientific breaktrough in the field of speech synthesis to you. our fellow german wissenschaftlers have developed an amazing technology which can make your computer put out sächsische sprache! yes i know it sounds crazy, but i tell you it is!!1
i found demo clip on teh internet which illustrate this topic better. just listen to wonderful saxonian talk of sabine and michael.

Hallo there everybody. Last weekend some friends of mine have had loaded me on their weisswurstessen. Chucky fuck was the man who went to the tante emma laden and bought this very very fine weisswursts. additionally we had a kasten of weissbier. That's how the bavarian do every day. Us preussen have weissbier and weisswurst essen for usual only once or twice a week. Every Tuesday and Thursday the bierkutscher from bavaria comes to preussen and delievers weissbier in bottles and faesser and also brings this cute little weisswursts to us. When we do weisswurstessen in preussen we decorate the stuben in bavarian colors.
When the weisswursts are hot (we call it aufgebrueht) the hausfrau serves the weisswursts. At the same time the hausherr fills his glass up with weissbier. After that we eat weisswursts with suesser senf (also from bavaria) and have some weizen for the rest of the day.

the geilen shit is in any case times that!!1 'brothers RAP' now finally times in their nr one song clearly made and expressed which i.e. we to make here so all day long, eat - by the grill. which me however totally disturbs is that the guys in the video there so the electrical grill uses. comes completely uncool. thus I use to grillen a large fire with a grill rust of 120cm diameter. to grill we go either into the forest or a wind-protected cave. which in the project of the 'brothers RAP' was also suppressed is that with to eat - closely already married - also drinking beer to it belongs. We call that sauffen.

-so that this is well to read for all. I have let google translated this

As on every saturday evening i watched Stackenblochen. As they always got something new they introduced two more punishment techniques yesterday. One of them was really funny and innovative, that automated pepper gas method. What a surprise in the candidate's face expression!
But they should not have shown the second technique. In foreign countries using baseball bats only supports the picture of cruel and nazi people in germany. These days everybody has to take google video and youtube into his calculation, but luckily this broadcast has not shown up there yet.
If anyone not from germany has not seen what fun Stackenblochen really is, there is an older sequel on youtube: Youtube video (taken from an american show who did a feature on it)
How do you think about that?

ok, ok, so dj dope gunther is not teh greatest. after watching weird al's new clip, admiral specht came to the conclusion that dope gunther is dwarfed to second platz by this amazing achievement! (on international scale that is. in deutschland dope gunther ist ofcourse still no.1!!1)

it make admiral specht very angry when he hear the peoples spreking that german music ist all about volksmusikk, but that is so not correct!
in germany also we have very much professional djs which play the very loud tekkno music. you don't believe me i know, but a video i have to proof!! the dj at the video ist called dope günther for a certain reason, but that reason i don't know. ich sorry. it shows small bit of his brilliant liveset of romantic songs performed in small club in my village.

the word of stackenblog spreads and now we see the first namefaking. beware of teh cheap imitations in the world wide netz. jawoll!

German engineering. German currywurst. German sneakers. German currywurst sneakers. Yes, currywurst sneakers. This is the classic shoe, the German from the street wears. We are paying tribute to the much-loved fast-food snack called currywurst. Wildly popular, it's the combo of hot pork sausage, ketchup and curry powder, available all over Germany, because the Germans hardly eat other things. With these shoes we show our national pride!

Dear stackenblog, in the last few month living in hannover germany i met many people what uncorrectly use the umlauts in german. i think the right site to place some introductions of the correctly using umlauts is this webseite. for some example lets take the word unkraut (that vegetables flooding my vorgarten) when you have only one unkraut in your vorgarten thats unkraut. but if there are many (what most is the case) then it is unkräuter spelled with the umlaut-a wich we in germany use for this.
Another example comes from my favourite beer. herrenhäuser. YOU HAVE TO SPELL IT WITH AN A-UMLAUT!!1 Not herrenhauser or herrihausen or somewhat like this. its herrenhäuser with a german a-umlaut. (also not to spell herrenhaumlautuser)
a complete introduction on using german umlauts will follow soon. now after ereasing the unkräuter in my vorgarten i will spend some time with my herrenhäuser.

My grandvater drew these pictures of me, while i was on a hunt for big krakes last summer. As the Krake called me a 'Kraut' (how stupid...), i immediately gave him what he deserved!
Afterwards, i made a Party at the nice German Beach and celebrated myself and how tough I was. It was even some kind of romantic, just me and the arm of the Krake on the Grill. As you all know, German Beer ist the best. Therefore we drink it every day what makes us eben more stronger. So I had a real nice Bavarian Beer and stayed til Dawn.